Why didn't I know?

Why didn’t I know?

It’s a question I’ve heard a thousand times in my head...maybe more.

When your child dies of an alcohol and drug overdose it’s a question that won’t go away.

Let me ask, have you ever allowed your son or daughter to go to someone’s house to play video games after school? The parents are going to be home. It’s during the day and they will only be there a couple of hours, so it seems safe...right? 

What about going to a friend’s house for a few hours on a Saturday afternoon to hang out? The friend’s mom or dad is working around the house while they play in the yard, watch movies, play games, eat all the food in the fridge. The same things they do at your house...right?

Do you allow them to go to an adult supervised party? There will be pizza, soft drinks, and other junk food. It will be fine...right?

If you’re a parent, at some point, you will be faced with the decision of whether or not to allow your child to spend time at another child’s home. When your kids are in elementary school their circle of friends is small and it’s fairly easy to get to know a handful of families, but when they reach middle and high school things change rapidly. They have friends from school, sport leagues, church groups, camp, internet and friends of friends. When they begin driving it gives them freedom to go places and come in contact with people of whom you know little or nothing. At this point, you realize the relationships with your child’s friend’s families on the perimeter are shallow at best and non existent in some cases. What do you do?

You can’t lock your teens up and keep them from ever going outside of your home, so you check things out. You talk to your teenager. You talk to other parents you trust in the community. The problem is our teens don’t always tell us what we need to know to keep them safe. And other parents may only know the same thing you do; what they’ve seen in public. Truth is we don’t know what is allowed behind closed doors and it can be dangerous or even deadly for our kids.

It was deadly to my son, and I can tell you exactly why I didn’t know.  He and his friends had a place they could go to party. This house, this family seemed just like any other from the outside, but behind the closed doors of their home they allowed my son and other people’s children to make decisions they were not old enough to make. These kids were hidden from the watchful eyes of responsible, caring adults. It was a place where the adults who should have been supervising them allowed young teenagers to drink alcohol, smoke marijuana, and more, and then allowed them to stay overnight further concealing their activities from their parents. By the time my son would get home the next morning he was fine, with no sign of drinking or drugs. That is, until it killed him.

Don’t let this happen to your family. Don’t be the one asking, “Why didn’t I know?”

Please join me in asking our state Senators to give HB 1211 a hearing and “Do Pass” vote when it comes before the Public Safety and Appropriations committees. HB 1211 will strengthen our state’s Social Host law by closing the gaps that currently exist and will provide law enforcement the tool they need to hold adults accountable statewide.

Passing HB 1211 will save lives...maybe the life of someone you love.