What if I don't know?

What if my teen has a party when I’m not home?

This seems to be the concern of many parents in regard to strengthening our state’s social host law.  I hear comments like: I think it’s a good idea, but I don’t want to pay a fine or go to jail if my child does this behind my back when I’m not at home or sleeping.

Here are some things to consider:

The current Oklahoma law says, “No person shall knowingly and willfully permit any individual under twenty-one (21) years of age...*”; therefore, the law enforcement investigating such a situation must be able to prove that you knew the minors were drinking and/or using other controlled dangerous substances.

You can, and should, take steps to protect yourself and ensure that underage guests staying in your home don’t have access to your alcohol. Foolishness is born in the heart of a child, so lock your liquor up, and for that matter, your prescription drugs too. If you keep beer/wine in the fridge make sure your teens and their underage house guests know they are not allowed to help themselves, and if they do that there will be consequences. Speak to their parents, and if this doesn’t end the behavior I, personally, would not allow them to be a guest in my home again.

You should be aware that some Oklahoma municipalities have enacted social host ordinances that charge whoever is in control of the residence, which could include your teenager, if they are hosting a party when you are out of town or not at home. While this is not the case with the state law, you still need to make your kids aware that you, and they, could be held accountable if someone is gravely injured or killed and their family decides to take civil action.

Strengthening the state law gives you an excuse --if you need one-- to tell your teens “No.” You can then explain to them that it is against the law and you are not willing, and they should not expect you to risk getting caught and having to pay a fine or spend time in jail in order to allow them to drink with their friends in your home.

If you are hosting an adult party in your home, and there are minors present, it is your responsibility to ensure they are not served nor have access to alcohol by taking reasonable steps to prevent its consumption. Reasonable steps would include checking the IDs of young guests you are not sure to be of legal drinking age, and not leaving alcohol unattended or accessible to underage guests. If you should discover an underage guest has consumed alcohol you should take any unconsumed alcohol away from them, and notify their parents or legal guardian. Then make sure they do not get in a vehicle to drive because if they have an accident you could be held accountable for providing alcohol to a minor.

Probably the most important thing to think about is how you and your teenager would deal with knowing that their decision to allow underage friends to drink alcohol or consume other substances in your home caused a devastating injury or death. It’s not an easy thing to live with the rest of your life.   

*To read the full text of the current statute see the tab on the left side of the page.